Hieeee ! I was planning to do this post for a long time. And I think this is the right time because school is starting and I want a "New beginning". I think even as a little boy I was scared how people are going to look at me and how will I look at myself. I think because I didn't feel totally comfortable in my skin I was always hiding myself with my style and my clothing. And a big plus to my insecurity was also being a perfectionist. I think the moment I came in this world I was different baby. And now as a teenager I feel the same way. But let me tell you what this post is all about. My insecurities ! Since 8th grade I am having problems with my skin and I am having problems with acne. My acne story is not even a half like some people, but It effects me a lot. I have to say but all my photos are photoshoped. It's because I'm scared what people are going to think and how will I look at myself. I am really sarcastic and overly "happy" with myself. But that is a wall to hide that actually I was not so happy with my look. Even photos above are photoshoped. But that's why I am not showing my hair. As my title is saying "Everyone is sort of incomplete" I wanted to take one thing off my appearance so I can hide my skin. Probably, now people who hate me are saying that I don't have to think about my look as much as I have to think about my "bitchy" behavior. And yes I can say that in real life I act that way, but It's because I am so tired of hearing how my skin is disgusting and how I look. Even in the first grade of primary school kids hated me because I was different and interested in different things. Now, I don't let everybody in my life, because I don't need stupid people in my life to destroy me. But If you are nice to me, I will give everything to help you and be there for you 24/7.
You are probably asking yourself If I like myself so much even with acne, why would I cover them up in photoshop? And answer is in the title. I know that me loving my self fully is not over yet. And that is incomplete part of me and loving myself no metter what.
I can't thank myself enough for opening this blog and to all of my friends. Last year I started to love myself. Before I was scared to take my t-shirt off even though I had amazing body, I was scared to wear tank tops because my shoulders had some acne on them. But now I am scared of nothing. I love to see myself in mirror everyday,I love my naked body and I love to complete my body with beautiful outfits that I picked, and that outfits probably 88 % of people from my town won't like. But I don't care for for those 88 %, I care for 12 % of people who respect me and my dreams.
I know what I want to be one day and who I am now as this incomplete one. People who don't like me can kiss my perfect a*s and one day when I will be in L.A. walking around in my prada shoes they still will be in this little Croatia running around "our" beautiful city Bjelovar.
And please all of you, learn from my mistakes. Don't waste your time because some stupid idiots said that your body is wrong. Because your body is beautiful no metter what and how many problems you might have.